We all want to feel better, right? We all want to be better parents, better partners, better co-workers. We want to feel more secure in our bodies and in our lives. Personal growth and development can help us get there.
So, what is personal growth and development? Well, you could call it transformation, change, betterment, self-improvement, spiritual curiosity, self-discovery. Call it what you want…it’s your journey! I personally like the term “self-discovery,” but that’s just me.
I’ve struggled with stress and anxiety, and maybe you have, too. And when I was in the midst of that struggle, I knew something had to change, and I knew I had to get serious about that change or I’d never do anything except marinate in “what if” or “what now”?
I decided to jump into personal growth and development – self-discovery – and to challenge the assumptions of my life. It changed me…so much so, I gave a TEDx talk on it, wrote books about it, and coach on it because I wanted to share the journey.
Personal Growth and Development Starts When You Decide to Start
No matter your chosen term for personal growth and development, it starts with a decision.
To get on the path, you have to decide to take a step. Maybe you want to change your eating habits or build your body. Maybe you want to control your anger or get out of a negativity rut. Maybe you want to get to the root of emotional issues to live a life of more freedom. Maybe you want to learn a new skill, get a degree, explore spiritual life, increase your confidence at work, boost your self-esteem, or clear your debt.
Whatever it is, you have to arrive at the crossroads and decide to take the first step.
Getting on the Personal Growth and Development Path
There are as many ways to start the journey of personal growth and personal development as there are ways to define it. It’ll be different for each person, but there are three important questions you can ask up front:
- Where am I now? Think about what you have now, and the tools, strengths, and passions you already possess. Maybe you have a supportive group of friends. Perhaps you meditate, are a patient person, or have a curious mind. Do you like being outdoors? Do you have access to a coach? These are all tools and strengths that could help you get started.
- Where do I want to be? Consider the goal you want to achieve and why it matters to you. It can be bold (reducing cholesterol by 30 points or making three new friends to expand your social circle) or simple (five minutes of mindfulness practice per day) – the choice is yours!
- What tools can help me get there? Think about the resources you need and the budget you have. Do you need to hire a coach? Maybe you need to collect books to help you with concepts like mindfulness or meditation. Some tools will be free and easy (like my Mindfulness Quickstart Guide) or more expensive and complicated (a degree or certification program).
8 Simple Ways to Start Your Personal Growth and Development Journey
No matter what you choose to pursue on this road of personal growth and development, you need a place to start…a way in. Here are 8 effective (and mostly free!) ways to get started. They worked for me, and I hope they can work for you, too.
1. Practice mindfulness. Okay, so you’re probably thinking this means sitting and contemplating your navel. And it can be. But did you know it’s also washing your dishes, walking your dog, or cleaning your shower? That’s right. It’s all about being in the present moment and being aware of the stuff in your mind and the stuff in your body. Just notice it. Don’t judge. You’d be amazed what kind of impact that can have on your life.
2. Meditate. I know this sounds daunting. But you don’t have to travel to a distant mountaintop or cave, or sit in silence…and trust me, as a parent, I have very little silence around here. Just carve out 5-10 quiet minutes before bed to clear your mind and focus on your breath. You’re breathing anyway…might as well do something with it. Take a natural breath and just watch it. How does it feel? If you get pulled away or distracted, just bring your attention back to breath. That’s it. Do it before bed. Do it in your car before going into work…you can even sip your coffee while you do it. Give it a chance. Enjoy the calm.
3. Read and listen. Books and podcasts are a great way to absorb knowledge. Read books by people who’ve been where you are or achieved what you want to achieve. Listen to podcasts that interview people who have struggled or found success on their own journeys of personal and spiritual growth. Read blogs or seek out videos on YouTube. Do whatever you can to gain knowledge and grow!
4. Think positive. Yeah, yeah. I know. But here’s the thing: If we let negativity creep into our lives, and we don’t challenge it, it can really drag us down. If we keep telling ourselves that we’ll never reach our goals or that we won’t find the people and resources we need, chances are, we’ll sabotage this whole personal growth and development thing. If you can’t jump on the positivity train right away, it’s okay…start by noticing your negativity. You don’t have to do anything about it, just notice how it makes you feel. If you’re so inclined, say something nice to yourself in the mirror.
5. Write it down. Journaling is a great way to keep yourself honest, accountable, and invested in personal growth and development. When you write out your feelings, dreams, or thoughts, they become more tangible. Real. And writing can help us make connections and find insights we didn’t notice before. Journals give us a way to empty our mind, clear a space, and create a reference for when we need a reminder or inspiration. Oh, and you don’t have to write a novel. Just start with 10 words that mean something to you.
6. Stay Aware of Stressors. Life gets to us sometimes. Work, family, bills…if we’re not careful, we can be so consumed by stress that anxiety becomes a way of life. If you’re looking for a way to soar, start by noticing what weighs you down. Call your stressor out and then use other tools (like mindfulness, meditation, and journaling) to work through it. This one’s big for me. Stress was a way of life, and still is, but now, I use it as a trigger for mindfulness and not anxiety.
7. Get something done…no matter how small. It’s easier to do nothing than something. That’s why we procrastinate. Or, maybe we take on too much (I’m going to read 50 classic novels by year end!). Try this: Start with one small thing – one book, one conversation, one pound – and develop a routine or habit around it to keep the momentum going. Start small, and start now.
8. Get curious. A life of personal growth and development is a journey. And, like any good journey, there are sights to see and people to meet. Break out of your comfort zone and try new things – new conversations, new online groups, new trails into the woods. A good way to improve our lives is to explore the lives of others and to seek out new experiences.
Change doesn’t have to be overwhelming. You already have a lot of tools to use right now! So, next time you wash a dish pay attention to what you’re doing. Download a free podcast and hear people talk about the goals you’d like to achieve. Spend 5 minutes before bed focusing on breath or writing down your thoughts. Or both.
At the end of the day, how we define personal growth and development doesn’t matter. What DOES matter is that you’re working towards the life YOU want, and that you discover who YOU are.